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I love mustelid haberdashery, vinho verde wine, and wensleydale with fruit.

John Dies at the End - David Wong

I have this mantra in my head: "try to be positive, try to be positive, try to be positive"

But it's failing. 


I hate this book.  I hate this book for ever having been written.   I hate people for liking this book and giving it good reviews.  I hate the author for having written this book.  But mostly, I hate myself for reading this book. 

And I have a really strong "What the holy hell!?" reaction to those who love this book.  Every five star review just leaves me baffled.

David Wong is a not-terrible writer.   I like some of his articles at cracked.com, so I know he's capable of writing a decent article, at least.    I went into this book blind.  I didn't read any reviews or spoiler myself about it, and therefore I did not have any preconceived notions of what might happen.  I do know that there seemed to be a lot of extreme opinions from my friend (love/hate), so I did have expectations that it would be complicated.

But it wasn't.  It's a stereotypical "immature boy" book full of penis jokes, farting, "hilarious" dog diarrhea jokes and the like.   It is horror/gore porn with a dash of scifi/fantasy.   It was dumb, incohesive and just awful.  It rambled and does not have any humor that could be remotely compared to something like The HitchHiker's Guide (which is what I read... somewhere).  I can't even give it the "it's just mindless stupid for fun" good rating, because I love lots of mindless (or even downright bad) books, but this one?  No.