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I love mustelid haberdashery, vinho verde wine, and wensleydale with fruit.

Outlander  - Diana Gabaldon

I read this book originally in 1999, and I loved it like puppies.   I thought it was a fantastic romance-y fantasy thing that was great.   I think I read one sequel and got bored with it and quit the series.

Because it is coming out as a mini series, I figured I would give it a quick read (haha, it's a damn doorstop) to refresh my memory.


So I picked it up to discover that the suck fairy (with her buddies misogyny and homophobia fairies) got in there and threw her wand around like there was no tomorrow. 


It's a bit of a tedious read.   Some passages can be atmospheric and excellent, and while I appreciate some good wordiness when it's needed, I felt like I was just dragging myself through paragraph after paragraph through some areas.   So the writing was a mixed bag for me.   I was rather disappointed in the sexy-time scenes, they're just not good.


Basic plot?  Mary Sue (or Clare, whevs) gets sucked through time travel magic stones, and ends up in the past.   She falls in lust with a hunky dude (who is in fact a delightfully virgin Marty Stu), but is luckily forcibly married to him, so her dirty, dirty adulterous sex isn't, in fact, dirty.   Then she does something stupid, and hunky barbarian beats her but it's all OK.  He explains it and makes it all legit and not a problem so we just walk away from that scene like nothing happened.  So Mary-Sue Clare keeps tripping her way through history with an evil mustache-twirling ancestor of her future-husband occasionally capturing her and abusing her with a bonus threat of rape. 


And then, what really gets me is that PROOF of the evilness of the guy?  He's homosexual, so we also get some surprise!buttsecks!rape! for Marty-Stu Jamie, because, of course, that's what the evil guy wanted all along.


So, yes, lessons learned:
Sex is only OK if you're married (and not GAY married, of course)

It's OK to beat your wife, she'll totally understand, even when she's a rather educated woman from the future

Homosexuals are evil.


It's not terribly written (though not totally my cup of tea), and I've certainly read worse.  But the ideas presented are definitely not something I'm on board with nowadays.